Rick’s Rants and Raves

I’m always interested to see how people come to find my site. Of course, nearly anyone who blogs is a link whore. I also like to monitor how people found me via search engines. The Wordpress plugin Firestats does a very nice job of showing me the search terms used. But I want to brag to the world how other people are finding me.

My web host allows me to enable AWStats on my sub-domains. I have it enabled on journal.nearbennett.com, and I check all the stats periodically. For example, it was really fascinating to see a bunch of hits come from Stumble Upon for my hard drive clock post. AWStats has a lot of good information that I’m not sure I want to share with the whole world, so I have the whole directory structure protected. But I want people to be able to see what search terms are leading people to my site. So I created a very small PHP script to by-pass the protection, and allow someone to view My Influence on the World.

Here is that PHP code for you to enjoy.
#!/usr/local/bin/php4.cli
< ?php
include_once("../../awstats/journal/awstats.journal.nearbennett.com.keyphrases.html");

?>

Yeah, I know its not much to be proud of, but hey, it works. And its like the third thing I’ve ever done with PHP (the first was of course ‘hello world‘).

I’m pleased to report that if you search Google for hard drive clock, my post is the third on the list behind Make. Yes, I did that a while ago, but please allow me to bask in my glory a little while longer.

Oh, and now people are selling hard drive clocks on eBay. I particularly like this quote:

There are very few of these in existence, probably less than 20.

Yeah, right. I’ve made three my self. And considering this place sold out, I’m pretty sure there are more than 20 of these things out there.

When I grew a goatee, I was aware that I was very late to the fashion. But when it becomes a topic of a Dilbert cartoon… well what more can I say?

If I do say so my self, this is the best Guacamole recipe. Ever. Inspired by (ok, nearly stolen from) Jeff Smith, the Grumpy Gourmet. The ingredients are his, the quantities are mine, from memory.

• 2 Ripe avocados. Do not buy 2 ripe avocados. Buy 2 hard avocados, and wait 2-4 days until they are ripe. You will have one day in which they are perfect. When they are perfect, do not delay. If you buy ripe avocados, they’ll be half-brown from all the bruising they took in the store.
• 2-4 green onions, sliced crosswise, thin
• Juice of half a lime (1 tablespoon)
• 1/2 to 1 tsp of salt
• 1 to 2 tsp of ground cumin
• 2 tablespoons of fresh salsa. The quality of the salsa will directly impact the quality of your guacamole. First preference: your own fresh salsa, made yesterday. Second preference: store bought fresh salsa that was in a refrigerator case. If the avocados are ripe, and you have no other choice, use your favorite jar salsa. Don’t blame me if your guacamole is only so-so.
• 1-3 tablespoons cilantro leaves, coarsely chopped

Combine everything in a bowl and mash with forks or fists until you are happy with the results.

I found this on a box of Kraft Mac N Cheese once a couple years ago. Almost immediately, they took it off. The conspiracy theorist in me said “If people knew it was this easy to make microwave mac n cheese, they wouldn’t buy the high priced ‘Microwave Mac N Cheese’, so they had to take it off.” Whatever the motivation, I’ve never seen this anywhere else. This has worked with every brand of “standard” mac & cheese–the kind with the powdered cheese.

No-Drain Microwave Macaroni and Cheese
1 7oz box of Mac & Cheese mix
1 3/4 cup HOT tap water
1/4 cup milk
1/4 cup butter

Put macaroni in a 2 qt bowl with HOT tap water. If you can’t use HOT water, adjust cooking time accordingly.
Cook in microwave for 9 to 9 1/2 minutes, stirring once or twice. All the water should be absorbed and macaroni tender. Stir again after it is finished.
Add cheese mix, milk and butter, stirring until butter is melted and cheese powder is cheesy.