Rick’s Rants and Raves

Earlier this month, my wife started getting the following error while using Outlook 2003:

Trie File Open Error. C:\PROGRA~1\COMMON~1\MICROS~1\SMARTT~1\Lists\1033\stocks.dat: The system cannot find the file specified.

We had just wiped and reinstalled Windows XP on her laptop, and then went through re-installing all her applications. It seemed that the error went away if we uninstalled AVG Free, and then did a repair on Microsoft Office. But once AVG Free was re-installed, the error came back.

Finally it occurred to me to see if the file really wasn’t in the directory indicated. Nope. Not on her laptop. But I had it on my work laptop. So we copied it to the directory specified in the error message. She hasn’t seen the error message for 2 weeks now.

OK, its time I came out of the closet: I’m an Agnostic Atheist. I call myself an Agnostic Atheist because I’m not really sure which applies to me. I’m pretty sure that I’ve never really seen evidence of god, but I’m not so sure I believe “God” doesn’t exist. For me, it boils down to this analogy: as consumers, we demand information on the services that will be provided to us. People of “faith”, as far as I can tell, make no such demands. They aren’t even clear on what “God” does for us. For those who are sure that god does stuff, their evidence for that stuff, or that god did it, is pretty weak. Therefore, I find no personal benefit to believing in god(s).

Anyway, I’m not writing this post to defend agnosticism or atheism, or to bash people of faith. I provide this preface to allow the reader to understand that I am not currently a person of faith in an external deity. I have faith in a great many things, but my faith in deities is currently pretty low.

But there is a problem–I go to church. I go because my wife goes. I go because we’ve developed an extensive network of friends at the church. I go because a significant portion of our family goes. Fortunately, we go to a UCC church which is incredibly liberal. They allow for “individual interpretation” of Christianity, and I’ve sort of allowed myself the following interpretation: “God” is a metaphor for Universe; “Jesus” is a metaphor for (or maybe really was) a person who modeled kindness as a virtue; all of the stories are intended as metaphors to teach certain lessons. While I’m at church I don’t sing the hymns or participate in the prayers because I don’t want to. The hymns and prayers stretch my metaphors to the breaking point, so therefore I simply can’t speak them. I don’t believe their words, so I don’t speak them.

I know this doesn’t work well, and its been a bit of an uncomfortable truce. But it allowed me to be with my family and see my friends. I’ve even found a few fellow skeptics–other people who don’t take any of it literally, or even strongly metaphorically. I have even joked about doing a FSM Small Group during our education hour prior to service.

Last week, our senior minister announced that we don’t go to church to see friends or family. We only go to give glory to god. (I’ve tried to get a recording of the service so that I could have the direct quote, but both tapes I’ve tried have been missing the part of service where he makes this announcement).

So, does that mean I’m not allowed to go to this church unless I believe I’m giving glory to god? That seems to conflict a bit with the “doctrine” of individual interpretation. Does it mean that my presence, whether I believe or not, is evidence to our Senior Minister of god’s work in me?

To put it plainly, I do not go to church to give glory to god. I go to be with family and friends (whom I do believe in). If the minister declares this to be untrue, how should I to react? I have come up with two possible reactions: I blow off the comment since I don’t believe about half of what he says anyway; Or, I could try to uproot my myself (and maybe my family) and move to a Unitarian church where the God=Universe metaphor is more supported.

I’ll admit, I find bumper stickers intriguing. Why have we chosen to mark our cars in order to make a statement? What really gets me is that bumper stickers are almost always permanent (yes, some are removable, but those seem to be rare), and they are almost always about a topic that has a certain expiration date–political candidates are a perfect example.

The other day I saw this one (circular) “Gas Prices Stink” without any other adornment.

Really? What is the point of putting that little rant on the back of your car? Complaining about gas prices is like complaining about the weather–all the whining in the world won’t change the price of gas or alter the path of the storm.

At what level does the price of gas no longer stink? I personally would love it if fuel were free. I would love it if the fuel to run our cars just came pouring out of the sky, right down onto my car. That way I wouldn’t have to go to a gas station, or pay anything to anyone. Wow, wouldn’t it be great if we could just drive around, soaking up the fuel in order to drive around some more?

Hrm, maybe solar power could work like that….

Then we could complain about the weather on our bumper stickers: “Cloudy Skies Stink”. Of course, that would have the same impact.

OK, this is fun. See this miniature swing?

It isn’t really a miniature. I used the Fake Tilt Shift technique to make it look miniature. I’m pretty pleased with the results.