Rick’s Rants and Raves

Here are some random thoughts from our annual pilgrimage to the Chautauqua Institution.

• Bicycle topic 1 this week: Emily and Anne had brand new bikes, with aluminum frames, soft seats, and 7 gears. Emily’s is a full adult sized 26″ bike. Oh. My. Garsh.
• Bicycle topic 2 this week: Emily’s bike was “borrowed” for about 20 hours until I found it behind a denominational house. The “borrower” hadn’t even bothered to take off the pink plastic hearts from her spokes. We spent most of our waking hours glancing at every bike that went by to see if it was Emily’s.  I found this habit difficult to break even three days after I found it. We started locking Anne’s and Emily’s bikes afterwards. I also noticed that, other than at “club”, 30-50% of all bikes at Chautauqua are locked.
• Bicycle topic 3: the house bikes look decent, but aren’t that great to ride. While climbing what has become known as “Bennett’s Bloody Bend” (the hill above the sailing center) a gear slipped while I had all my weight on my right foot. I lost my balance and rolled right over the bike, hitting the pavement with my right shoulder and elbow, most knuckles, and right knee. The damage was minor–the pavement was easily repaired. I’ll probably have a scar on a knuckle and knee. And the rear rim of the bike is bent.
• Sailboat lessons are well worth the $60 (a $10 increase from last year) as long as you get a cute, young, friendly instructor. Oh, and as long you can go with someone you love. We had a great time, and did well enough that the instructor let us do almost all the sailing. Our only regret: we didn’t take the camera.
• Drama and disappointment on day one of club does not indicate a bad week ahead.
• Clouds and nastiness 5 miles from Lake Erie does not mean clouds and nastiness on the beach. (Oh, and be sure of the directions to Presque Isle before you leave Chautauqua).
• It seems the Chautauqua Institution is cutting back on bike patrol. Several of us commented on it. There was a report of an attack (or was it an attempted attack?) on a student at a practice room one evening. And then there was the bike incident! And I distinctly saw some kids in Group 2 flash a gang sign–Erie Crips if I’m not mistaken. What has Chautauqua come to?
• Theo introduced me to Hed PE (NSFW) on Friday. Take 2 pounds Limp Bizkit, add 2 cups Korn, salt with plenty of profanity, then grind together with Rage Against the Machine. That is Hed PE. I love it. (sorry, Mom)
• We got to see Switchfoot, where Emily officially fell in love with her first lead singer. And I took the best picture of the week.
• Next year may be the first time we let the kids have their own rooms, especially if Emily invites a friend to go with her (which right now seems like a good idea).
• Next year will be Nathan’s first to go kayaking and sailing at club.

While in Kentucky for a business trip, I noticed an interesting disconnect in the fines levied for certain offenses:

• The maximum fine for providing (or attempting to provide) alcohol to a minor: $250. In Ohio, you could get jail time. In Kentucky? Bah. Give up some profits from your still, and “don’t let us catch you doing that again!”
• The maximum fine for littering: $500. For real? Yup–signs all along the freeways.

It is twice as bad to throw a cigarette out your window as it is to contribute to the delinquency of a minor.  Evidently Kentucky is more concerned with keeping their countryside beautiful than protecting their youth.

Um, erm, I mean “Pumping Iron at the Best West”

The “Exercise Facility” at the Best Western where I’m staying consists of a) a exercise bike, b) a treadmill, c) a stairmaster(R), and d) a nautilus all-in-one-piece-of-scheize.  I wasn’t really surprised, but I ws a bit jealous to learn from a co-worker that a neighboring hotel has free-weights.

So I walk in to do a little mid-week exercising while traveling. I hop on the bike to warm up. But the control board doesn’t work. No RPMs, no time elapsed, no MPH, nothing. And the right pedal has a really disconcerting thunk on the down stroke. Fine, I say, I’ll switch to the treadmill. As soon as I turn it on, the “lubricate belt soon” light comes on. It has a slightly annoying squeal as I get up to jogging speed, but, hey, I’m only on it for a few minutes, so I can put up with it. Unfortunately, the treadmill can’t handle my ironman 6mph for more than 2 minutes and spontaneously shuts off. Unceremoniously.  Without. Warning. Fine, I’ll try the stairmaster. I’ve never used a stairmaster, despite the fad from the 80’s. I give it a valiant try, and started breathing hard enough to consider myself warmed-up.

On to the natuilus. Had it been in my home, and had I paid less than $300 for it used, I would have been reasonabley pleased with it. Actually, it would have been fine had there a) not been bent pieces making leg exercises dangerous, and b) not been a wall right next to the floor level pulley, making 1/3 of the movements exercises in wallpaper removal.

Ah well. Beggars can’t be choosers. My work schedule didn’t allow for me to go a local gym for a full workout. Instead, I got 45 minutes of pecs, lats, and biceps. Oh, and I got a few squats in next to the wall.

The oddest moment was when a dude (with a bushy Texas style mustache) wearing street clothes comes in from the pool area (right across the hall), inspects the bike, hops on for 15 seconds, then leaves with a “Have fun” comment. Um, yeah. Will do. Thanks.

Ah the joys of traveling. I can’t wait to be home. Only to leave again. At least my next trip will be with my wife and kids.

There used to be a generation gap–the boomers and their parents were very different. Technically, I’m part of Generation X, and my kids (according to Wikipedia, THE SOURCE OF ALL KNOWLEDGE) are part of the second wave of Generation Y. Two events recently have helped me to see that I’ll probably be closer to my kids socially than I am to my parents, or they are to theirs.

1. My kids were desperate, nay, absolutely desperate, to see the original Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark. There are a number of reasons for the feverish pitch in recent weeks, but ultimately they couldn’t wait to beg us day in and day out to see the movie. This weekend we finally had a chance, and they loved it. That movie came out when I was my daughter’s age.
2. Today as we were driving home from dinner, my daughter heard Bon Jovi’s Livin’ on a Prayer to which she exclaimed “Turn it Up! I love this song.” Of course we obliged as I reminisced about cranking it while cruising Reynoldsburg (Oh, the happenin’ R’burg) as a teenager. I couldn’t have imagined then that my own daughter would love that song over 20 years later. She delivered the coup de grace to my teen angst memories when she said “When we get home, can we put this on my MP3 player?”

I thank the media. I blame the media. I thank the DVDs, CDs, and digital media for making my kids adore the same stuff I did when I grew up, and “came of age.” It tickles me to no end to see them devoting hours to reading the Complete Calvin and Hobbes on lazy Sunday mornings.